But today we get back to the ads. In fact, we're going to do a little comparison between two different companies with a similar theme: boners.
Yes, as in an erect penis. And yet neither of these companies should be associated with dicks or sex whatsoever. Yet here we are.
The reason for this comparison is because one of these commercials was banned in the U.S. The other one I see on TV regularly. Now, usually you'd expect me to hate one or the other, but in this case, I kind of like both. Of course, that makes for a much more boring experience here, hence the comparison and my ranting being aimed toward censorship more than poor advertising this time.
Let's start off with the banned one.
Apologies for the weird glitches near the end, but not my fault nor my problem!
Here we have IKEA, best known for being the number one proponent for Allen Wrenches ever. A Swedish, I think, furniture company that makes the cheapest, shittiest furniture. And the number one reason college kids have anything to sit on at all.
A commercial with a simple message: guys who can't get to sleep will get turned on by their wives.
Or something like that.
You see the guy uncomfy in an awful bed, and then, innuendo. In YOUR endo. Scrubs references keep coming.
But what happens? Boner!
Wait, no. It's a spring. Because it's a shitty bed. And the guy has erectile dysfunction, so he can't actually get it up, which is why she was sleeping and he was lying awake from embarrassment. Or so I interpreted it. And you did, too. And if not, then you're welcome for my analysis.
This commercial was banned, which doesn't seem to be uncommon for IKEA. They have one with a kid playing with regular toys, matchbox cars, and a vibrator. The message being "Tidy Up." Effectively put, I'd say. Youtube lists several more banned commercials in the "related" section, and with America's "Sex is Bad" censorship, you can't be too surprised.
But then we come to this.
Yes, Arby's = Sex. Gross.
Like I said, I like both commercials, but THIS one I see every day. Let's dig in:
It's chubby's (teehee!) birthday. His wife/girlfriend roleplays for him as a special gift. Not unheard of, right?
Then the twist! She roleplays as an Arby's counter worker carrying in some delicious* fast food, obviously uncomfortable that her guy enjoys such a fantasy. And then what?
Schwing!
Yes, people, he gets an implied boner. From a chicken sandwich (heh, COCKadoodle doo! So clever). Oh, and his pretty attractive girl.
Not quite my Liv Tyler as Zelda fantasy, but to each his or her messed-up own.
Both pretty entertaining commercials, to be honest. But there's a problem. The one that was banned ultimately shows that the innuendo? It's the reason for the ad. The broken bedspring, which then implies "Come get IKEA's furniture! It will also break on you, and probably without hilarious situations, but it only costs $2.50!" All implications of sex are taken away with the big (heh) reveal.
But the Arby's commercial goes the opposite way. The product brings on the innuendo. It's telling us this guy gets a hard-on for sub-par chicken. The Arby's logo isn't exactly innocently shaped in this ad.
Yet the one that resolves without sex is the one banned, while the one that results in naughtiness is the one shown in heavy rotation.
I know I bring a lot of hate to advertising, but fuckin' A, America. You can't even get this one right with two decent commercials. You go with the greater of two evils, you putz.
Fuck! Now I'm just pissed. Well, I was pissed, and now I'm Aryan Raging. Guess I'll go oppress some people, as it is my style.
I'll try to dig up an awesome/awful holiday-themed commercial for Christmas Eve. Expect pure loathing on that day.
*Tolerable if you pretend what you're eating isn't rubber meat made from the same company that makes synthetic poop and puke. Heheh. Meat.
2 comments:
I think it's more natural to think erection with the IKEA commercial, while for the Arby's commercial it's possible to think "Oh, he's just thinking about Arbys?"
Yeah, the IKEA one makes it super obvious, but there is no doubt in my mind with the way the Arby's logo sprung up, the noise accompanying it, and the situation itself that it meant he had just popped his Enzyte and it finally kicked in.
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